Domestic Violence is a pattern of violent and coercive behavior, including physical, sexual and psychological attacks, that adults or adolescents use against their intimate partners.
We often ask ourselves why people in violent relationships stay with their partners. There could be any number of answers, including their love for the partner, fear of the unknown, a perceived lack of options or simply the toll that years of abuse can take on someone’s self-esteem.
Victims may show a variety of symptoms, including injuries with odd explanations, frequent illness or expressions of self-blame or guilt. Others may become isolated from family and friends or show low self-esteem. It is not uncommon for victims to deny or minimize their partner’s behavior.
You may be tempted to help. Before you do, please keep the following in mind:
What Can You Do?
- Learn and notice signs of abuse/sexual assault.
- Be non-judgmental.
- Learn more about domestic violence and sexual assault.
- Listen and believe the victims.
- Distribute or make available hotline numbers and/or other local resources and information.
What Shouldn’t You Do?
- Try to be an expert about domestic violence/sexual assault
- Investigate suspected abuse.
- Share your personal experiences of abuse.
- Report suspected abuse (unless child or elder abuse).
- Tell people what to do. Do not give advice or say “You should just leave…”
- Risk your personal safety.
The following is a list of resources available to victims of domestic violence. This is not a complete list, though it has a number of resources that should be very helpful to any victim. Share this list with anyone you think may be a victim.
Helping victims find the assistance they need is a crucial first step, and it’s important to let victims know that there is confidential, professional help available at any time. Again, do not try to solve the problem on your own.
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